One Liners I have no beef with vegetarians. Beef Jokes / Beef Puns / Food Jokes / Meat Jokes / Meat Puns / Vegetarian Jokes
One Liners If you want to stop bacon from curling in the pan, just take away its broom. Bacon Jokes / Broom Jokes / Cooking Jokes / Curling Jokes / Sports Jokes
One Liners Smaller babies may be delivered by stork but the heavier ones need a crane. Baby Jokes / Baby Puns / Crane Jokes / Funny Giving Birth Jokes / Stork Jokes
One Liners There’s something wrong with my cactus plant, but I can’t quite put my finger on it. Cactus Jokes / Cactus Puns / Finger Jokes / Plant Jokes
One Liners Whenever I try to eat healthy, a chocolate bar looks at me and Snickers. Candy Jokes / Candy Puns / Chocolate Jokes / Chocolate Puns / Diet Jokes / Eating Jokes / Health Puns
One Liners Tripped and hit my head on a snare drum and now I think I have a percussion. Concussion Jokes / Drum Jokes / Head Injury Jokes / Head Jokes / Injury Jokes / Instrument Jokes / Percussion Jokes
One Liners Thinking of going as a band-aid for Halloween this year, but it’d probably be hard to pull off. Bandaid Puns / Costume Puns / Halloween Costume Puns / Halloween Jokes
One Liners I didn’t realize my grandpa had a false tooth until it came out in conversation. Dental Jokes / False Teeth Jokes / Grandpa Jokes / Missing Tooth Jokes / Tooth Jokes
One Liners Getting paid to sleep would be such a dream job. Dream Jokes / Job Jokes / Jokes About Jobs / Sleep Jokes
One Liners I like to spell it “diarrhoea,” because it really makes it look like you’ve lost control of your vowels. Diarrhea Jokes / Grammar Jokes / Letter Jokes / Poop Jokes / Spelling Jokes / Vowel Jokes
One Liners What if soy milk is just regular milk introducing itself in Spanish? Milk Jokes / Soy Jokes / Soy Milk Jokes / Spanish Jokes
One Liners I used to be addicted to time travel, but that’s all in the future now. Addiction Jokes / Jokes About Time / Time Jokes / Time Travel Jokes
One Liners I’m so terrified to ask my wife to cleanup after breakfast that I’ve been walking on eggshells all day long. Breakfast Joes / Breakfast Puns / Cleaning Jokes One Liners / Egg Jokes / Egg Puns / Kitchen Jokes / Wife Jokes
One Liners I didn’t realize I’d be so obsessed with a pirate if I ever met one, but as soon as we shook hands I was hooked. Continue reading “I didn’t realize I’d be so obsessed with a pirate if I ever met one, but as soon as we shook hands I was hooked.” Captain Hook Jokes / Hand Jokes / Hand Puns / Hook Puns / One Hand Jokes / Pirate Jokes / Pirate Puns
One Liners Some of my friends like to make fun of me for always wearing mittens rather than gloves in winter, but I don’t like to point fingers. Cold Weather Jokes / Finger Jokes / Glove Jokes / Mitten Puns / Season Puns / Winter Jokes
One Liners Puns about ears are corny, but puns about the eyes are even cornea. Body Jokes / Body Part Puns / Ear Jokes / Ear Puns / Eye Jokes / Eye Puns
One Liners There’s a fine line between hyphenated words. Grammar Jokes / Grammar Jokes For Students / Word Jokes / Word Puns
One Liners I really love playing chess with elderly people in the park but it’s really hard to find thirty two of them willing to do it. Chess Jokes / Elderly Jokes / Game Jokes / Park Jokes
One Liners Tried to make a reservation at the library but they were booked. Book Jokes / Book Puns / Library Jokes / Puns About Books
One Liners I only tell chemistry jokes periodically. Chemistry Jokes / Chemistry Puns / Corny Science Jokes / Funny Chemistry Jokes / Periodic Table Jokes / Science Jokes
One Liners Geology rocks but geography is where it’s at. Geography Jokes / Geography Puns / Geology Puns / Rock Puns / Science Dad Jokes / Science Jokes
One Liners I like warm weather but only to a certain degree. Climate Puns / Hot Weather Puns / Jokes About Hot Weather / Season Puns / Weather Jokes
One Liners I cut my finger chopping cheese, but I think that I may have grater problems. Cheese Jokes / Cheese Puns / Finger Jokes / Injury Jokes / Jokes About Food
One Liners I had to change dentists because the last one hurt my fillings. Cavity Jokes / Dental Jokes / Dentist Jokes / Dentist Puns / Teeth Jokes / Tooth Jokes
One Liners Finger paintings are my favorite kind of digital media. Art Jokes / Digital Puns / Finger Jokes / Jokes About Art / Paint Jokes / Painting Jokes
One Liners I had to change dentists because the last one hurt my fillings. Dentist Jokes / Teeth Jokes / Teeth Puns / Toothache Jokes
One Liners Most people are shocked when they find out I’m not a real electrician. Electric Puns / Electrician Jokes / Electricity Jokes / Electricity Puns
One Liners I was once addicted to doing the Hokey Pokey, but then I turned myself around. Addiction Jokes / Cringy Dad Jokes / Dancing Jokes / Hokey Pokey Jokes
One Liners It takes a lot of balls to golf the way I do. Ball Jokes / Golf Jokes / Golf Puns / Sports Jokes
One Liners I failed math so many times at school, I can’t even count. Failure Jokes / Jokes About Math / Math Jokes / Math Jokes For Kids / School Jokes
One Liners The thought of getting a root canal done is unnerving. Dental Jokes / Dental Puns / Dentist Jokes / Teeth Jokes
One Liners Worst thing about salsa dancing is getting the tomato stains out afterwards. Dance Jokes / Dancing Jokes / Jokes About Food / Salsa Jokes / Tomato Jokes
One Liners Spiders are the only web developers who love finding bugs. Best Dad Jokes / Bug Puns / Insect Jokes / Internet Jokes / Spider Jokes
One Liners I’ve always been hesitant to post Monopoly puns but today I thought I’d take a Chance. Board Game Puns / Game Jokes / Monopoly Jokes
One Liners My Visa declined at the sweater store, so the cashier had to ask for my cardigan. Clothing Puns / Credit Card Jokes / Jokes About Clothes / Sweater Puns
One Liners Would making nun’s clothing be considered habit forming? Clothing Puns / Jokes About Clothes / Nun Jokes
One Liners The IRS has announced that all marijuana dealers must file a joint tax return. Funny Jokes For Adults / IRS Jokes / Marijuana Jokes / Tax Jokes / Tax Season Jokes
One Liners I was going to make myself a belt made out of watches, but then I realized it would be a waist of time. Clothing Jokes / Clothing Puns / Jokes About Time / Time Puns / Watch Puns
One Liners I wonder how much a zebra would cost if you scanned it. Animal Jokes / Animal One Liners / Barcode Jokes / Jokes About Animals / Zebra Jokes
One Liners A bartender broke up with her boyfriend, but he kept asking her for another shot. Bar Jokes / Bartender Jokes / Jokes About Alcohol
One Liners I knew she was a ghost the moment I saw her walk through the door. Ghost Jokes / Jokes About Ghosts
One Liners If Batman wasn’t rich… Would he be robin’? Batman Jokes / Batman One Liners / Rich People Jokes
One Liners If a child refuses to nap, are they guilty of resisting a rest? Nap Puns / Police Jokes / Sleep Jokes / Sleep Jokes One Liners
One Liners I was thinking about shaving both sides of my head, but I probably ought to mullet over. Hair Jokes / Hair Puns / Mullet Jokes
One Liners Someone stole my toilet and the police have nothing to go on. Continue reading “Someone stole my toilet and the police have nothing to go on.” Police Jokes / Toilet Jokes / Toilet Puns
One Liners Before the crowbar was invented, crows simply drank at home. Bar Jokes / Bird Puns / Crow Jokes / Tool Jokes
One Liners I couldn’t figure out how to fix the washing machine so I threw in the towel. Appliance Jokes / Towel Jokes / Towel Puns / Washing Machine Jokes
One Liners I used to hate facial hair, but then it grew on me. Beard Jokes / Body Part Puns / Hair Jokes
One Liners I’d tell you a chemistry joke, but all the good ones argon. Chemistry Jokes / Corny Science Jokes / Element Puns
One Liners To the guy who invented zero, thanks for nothing. Clever One Liners / Math Puns / Number Jokes
One Liners The magazine about cardiovascular disease went out of business due to poor circulation. Funny Heart Jokes / Heart Puns
One Liners I wasn’t originally going to get a brain transplant, but then I changed my mind. Brain Jokes / Medical Jokes / Surgeon Jokes
One Liners Is a person who takes care of chickens called a chicken tender? Chicken Jokes / Food Puns / Fowl Jokes / Jokes About Food
One Liners First week working at the bicycle factory and they already made me the spokes person. Bike Puns / Cringy Dad Jokes / Jokes About Bikes
One Liners My wife says I never buy her flowers, but I didn’t even know she sold flowers. Best Dad Jokes / Jokes About Marriage / Jokes About Wives / Wife Jokes
One Liners Thanks to autocorrect, 1 in 5 children got a visit from Satan this past Christmas. Autocorrect Jokes / Devil Jokes / Jokes About Christmas
One Liners My wife tried to beat me at Scrabble but I wooden letter. Best Dad Jokes / Board Game Puns / Game Jokes / Wife Jokes
One Liners A magician was driving down the street and then he turned into a driveway. Jokes About Driving / Magic Puns / Magician Puns
One Liners I know it’s a long shot but does anyone know what a trebuchet is? Long Shot Joke / Trebuchet Puns
One Liners My friends get mad when I steal their kitchen utensils but it’s a whisk I’m willing to take. Cringy Dad Jokes / Kitchen Jokes
One Liners If a pig loses its voice, does that make it disgruntled? Animal One Liners / Animal Puns / Jokes About Animals / Jokes About Pigs
One Liners My balloon elephant wouldn’t fit in the back seat of my car so I had to pop the trunk. Animal One Liners / Jokes About Animals
One Liners Marble is a valuable building material and should not be taken for granite. Construction One Liners / Construction Puns / Jokes About Construction
One Liners They should make a cat-themed spin-off of “Paw Patrol” and call it “Claw & Order.” Animal One Liners / Cat Puns / Jokes For Kids / TV Puns
One Liners At what age is it appropriate to tell my dog that he’s adopted? Animal One Liners / Dog Jokes / Dog Puns / Jokes About Animals
One Liners I needed a password eight characters long so I picked Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs. Disney Dad Jokes / Disney Jokes / Funny Disney One Liners / Password Jokes
One Liners I was going to quit all my bad habits for the new year, but then I remembered that nobody likes a quitter. New Years Jokes
One Liners Why is childbirth called delivery and not takeout? Funny Giving Birth Jokes / Jokes About Birth
One Liners I was thinking about moving to Moscow but there’s no point Russian into things. Geography Jokes / Geography Puns / Russian Jokes / Russian Puns
One Liners I lost my mood ring and I don’t know how I feel about it. Cringy Dad Jokes / Jewelry Jokes / Jewelry Puns
One Liners I saw some ducks practicing their teenage girl faces at the pond today. Duck Jokes / Funny Teen Jokes / Teen Jokes
One Liners Tripped and hit my head on a snare drum and now I think I have a percussion. Cringy Dad Jokes / Jokes About Music / Music One-Liners
One Liners I have this great construction joke, but I’m still working on it. Construction One Liners / Jokes About Construction
One Liners I use chemistry puns, but only periodically. Chemistry Jokes / Chemistry Puns / Element Puns / Science Dad Jokes
One Liners When a fish needs medicine, does it call the pharma-sea? Fish Puns / Medicine Jokes / Pharmacy Jokes
One Liners My chiropractor said I needed a posture alignment, but I think he was just pulling my leg. Chiropractor Jokes / Doctor Jokes
One Liners I wanted to post a chemistry pun, but I couldn’t zinc of anything. Chemistry Puns / Corny Science Jokes / Element Puns
One Liners I recently got crushed by an avalanche of books, but I suppose I’ve only got my shelf to blame. Book Jokes / Book Puns / Jokes About Books
One Liners Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker? Bank Jokes / Financial Puns / Money Jokes
One Liners Hey guys, remember when you could refer to your knees as right and left instead of good and bad? Good times. Jokes About Getting Old / Jokes For Old People / Old Age Jokes / Old Man Jokes / Old People Jokes
One Liners I didn’t realize I got fat until the cashier at McDonald’s apologized for my weight. Fast Food Jokes / Fat Jokes / Jokes About Eating / McDonalds Jokes
One Liners Smaller babies may be delivered by stork but the heavier ones need a crane. Baby Jokes / Birds Puns / Cringy Dad Jokes
One Liners I can’t remember that element, but it’s on the tip of my tungsten. Chemistry Jokes / Element Puns / Science Dad Jokes
One Liners I used to work in finance, but then I lost interest. Bank Jokes / Financial Puns / Money Jokes
One Liners All of you people can take all your bad chemistry puns and barium! Chemistry Puns / Science Dad Jokes
One Liners A bartender broke up with her boyfriend, but he kept asking her for another shot. Bar Jokes / Jokes About Alcohol / Jokes About Dating
One Liners I didn’t realize my dad was a construction site thief, but when I got home all the signs were there. Jokes About Construction
One Liners The electrons cost $5, but the neutrons are free of charge. Chemistry Puns / Funny Science Jokes
One Liners If money doesn’t grow on trees, then why do banks have branches? Continue reading “If money doesn’t grow on trees, then why do banks have branches?” Bank Jokes / Money Jokes / Tree Jokes / Tree Puns
